There's A Convenience Store Across The Street

A 5 dollar bill was out of order in my wallet.  It was mass hysteria

I'm very disappointed in you, Jeremy.  How could you let such a thing happen?

I'm not sure why I let things get this bad, but it was traumatic earlier today when I found out.  

So, the term "OCD" is highly overused, with people with mild compulsive tendencies over dramatizing themselves, claiming they have a clinical diagnosis of a debilitating disorder.  These people are insane.  

I, myself, have a couple small compulsions, though you'd never guess that by walking through my house 90 percent of the time.   About the only thing I'm really excessively scrupulous about is the cash in my wallet.  At all times, the bills must be lined up facing the same direction, right-side-up, and in denominational order.  This simply makes sense.  You either do it this way, or you're wrong.  This method makes it a very straight-forward process to determine roughly how much cash I have on me at any given time (Couple 20s in the back = OK.  Handful of Bills, and a Single in the back = I'm broke).  I can also pay any cashier with ease, knowing exactly where any bill should be...no more sorting through wads of folded-up money, trying to figure out if that 1 really means 10.  

Well, the whole dang opera fell apart today when I discovered a 5 mixed in with the 1s.  I don't know how a tragedy like this could have occurred, but my best guess is that I got a single back as change and just put it in the back of the pile, not realizing that there was a 5 back there.  Either way...massive systemic failure for Jeremy.  

This horror show was only compounded later.  Since I had like 8 dollars, it was time for a trip to the ATM.  The machine spit out my fat stack of 20s (not really all that fat, if I'm being honest...please don't mug me), and every last one of them was in a different orientation than the previous.  I had to stand there for multiple seconds, the machine desperately asking if I wanted to make another transaction while I sorted the mess out.  At least I had the presence of mind to put the new bills in the back of my wallet.  (Right next to my mace and stun gun...please don't mug me.)