It’s strangely difficult to find salsa flavored salsa
This sounds familiar for some reason.
Yeah, yeah, yeah...I know. This isn't exactly an original rant. Denis Leary did an Entire Bit On Coffee Flavored Coffee a while ago, and it was brilliant. This is the same thing, but it's just as true. It will have many fewer curse words than the above link.
Salsa is a very nice thing. It makes tortilla chips worth eating, which is a noble pursuit. But now, when I walk down the snack aisle at my neighborhood grocery, I'm faced with a veritable wall of salsa choices, and I no longer know where to start. The standard brands are all there, and I've learned that they all kinda suck. They're all tomato and salt, with varying degrees of jalapeno. Not great. So, I start looking toward the alternate brands. Herein lies my problem. None of them are salsa.
I'll offer you an abbreviated list of my available choices. I assure you that I'm not making any of these up. There is Ranch Campfire Roasted Salsa, Ranch Peach Salsa, Black Bean and Corn Salsa, Southwest Cilantro Salsa, Chipotle Salsa (Chipotle is a smoked jalapeno, if you weren't awares), Tomatillo Salsa, Texas Caviar Salsa (Texas Caviar is black-eyed peas, if you weren't awares), Three Bean Salsa, Sweet and Spicy Corn Relish, Corn and Chili Salsa, Chipotle Lime Salsa, Mango Salsa, Pineapple Salsa, Peach Salsa, Peach Mango Salsa, Roasted Garlic Salsa, Tequila Lime Salsa, Organic Salsa, Organic Green Salsa, Garlic Cilantro Salsa, Corn and Bean Roasted Red Pepper Salsa, Sriracha Salsa (This makes no sense at all), Habanero Salsa, and about three different kinds of Ghost Pepper Salsa.
Did you notice what was missing from the list? SALSA FLAVORED SALSA!
This is nonsense.
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