Limerick Day!

Stupid Bumper Sticker of the day: "Kids in Sports Stay Out of Courts."


Bumper Stickers Suck.

Most people are pretty tame when it comes to their bumper stickers, choosing to show off their kid's honor role status or their country of origin, and that's okay. Also, I don't have as much of an issue with people who splatter stupid bumper stickers all over the back of their piece of junk car to the point where the adhesive actually becomes integral to the structure of the car. But when somebody actively chooses to only have one or two bumper stickers, choosing their only message to send to the world, and it's something moronic, I really start to question that person.


How about an example, Jeremy?


Sure thing! Not long ago, I saw a car with only one sticker on it, telling people (in so many words) to use cloth diapers. Let alone the fact that I don't want to drive a car with the word "Diapers" written anywhere on it, but are you actually telling me that this person's single biggest contribution to society as a whole is using a cloth diaper? That's pathetic.


So how does that relate to today's Sametime Status?


So last week I drove behind a guy with a lone bumper sticker on the back of his car. It contained the above phrase, "Kids in Sports Stay Out of Courts." And it got me thinking of just what great life lessons all of my gym teachers ever taught me, which would be none, and how many of the best athletes in my high school are now serving me french fries, and how all of my gym teachers grew up to be...well...gym teachers, and at first I almost agreed with the sticker. Then I thought of the website Badjocks.com and all of the stories of high school athletes and coaches getting arrested. Then I thought of Michael Vick, who's still in jail. Then I thought of Roger Clemens, who will likely be spending the next two years in various courts. Then I thought of whoever that football player is who's suspended because of a shooting, and some other football player's car wash that got shot up, and that basketball player who ran up into the stands to cause a brawl, and that French guy that headbutted the other guy in the World Cup...and I thought...with all of these great role models, how can Kids in Sports POSSIBLY get in any trouble?

Then, I was alerted to an important story that is bound to shake the sporting world to its foundation. The reach of Performance Enhancing Drugs knows no bounds and has horrifyingly invaded yet another of our beloved pastimes. Ladies, Gentlemen, and People from Elmira, I present you the Troubling Story of Axel Buescher.

And while we're at it, how about Pete Rose, who is suspsended from Major League baseball for life...SINGING!