"Plasticky" Isn't As Catchy A Name As "Woody"

Silly woodpecker/alarm clock, the siding on my house is made of vinyl

Well, it's tan.  To a bird, there's not much difference.

I would imagine that wood and polyvinyl chloride resin taste very different.

But you wouldn't know that until after tasting it a little.  

So, not all that long ago, I got an interesting wake-up call.  It was that weird time in the morning, about 10 minutes before the alarm clock officially starts going off forcing me to decide if it's time to get up or merely shut off the beeping.  A woodpecker starts going to town on the siding of my house, right outside to the bedroom.

Woodpeckers are jerks.

In theory, the point of a woodpeckers pecking at wood is to eat bugs contained within.  This is all well and good if you're able to chip away at the wood and find stuff underneath.  I would imagine vinyl siding bounces a lot more and would be harder to peck into, exposing bugs.  I would also imagine there are fewer bugs inside than in a tree.  Regardless, this stupid woodpecker diligently pecked away at the siding for a solid 10 minutes, which was really annoying.  

I realize I at least partially brought this on myself.  I recently installed a new birfeeder (one that the Stupid Deer can't get into to eat all of my birdseed), with seed designed primarily for the larger of the songbirds.  Ostensibly, this means Cardinals, Blue Jays, and the occasional Nuthatch, but I do have a small family of woodpeckers nearby who are frequent guests at the feeder.  (On a somewhat unrelated note, the Nuthatches are awesome.  They take a seed, wedge it into the cracks in the wood on my deck's railing, then proceed to peck at the seed until it opens.  Highly entertaining to watch.)  So the fact that I'm encouraging woodpeckers to be nearby is entirely on my shoulders...but they should ave the decency to return the favor by keeping themselves to the trees and feeder.  Also, they shouldn't wake up until after my alarm goes off.