Try Not To Picture Newt Gingrich In A Speedo

I really had to argue with myself over watching the debate last night

And what did the two of you agree upon?


Oh, I totally didn't watch the thing.

The way I see it, political debates are really no different from sitcoms.  The characters are made up parodies of actual people, they stand up and spout of scripted lines, occasionally make fun of the other characters, and very little of what they say or do is true. 

That fully understood, I like sitcoms a lot more than political debates.  I've actually grown to enjoy spending time with those characters and I'm rarely told that they are to be hated and are destroying America.  The jokes in sitcoms are usually funnier, too. 

If you want me to watch a political debate, the best thing to do would be to broadcast it in conjunction with World Wrestling Entertainment.  Vince McMahon should totally get down on this.  At least in pro wrestling, one of the characters is a bad guy, and actually is evil.  The insults on wrestling broadcasts are far better than in a standard debate, and...let's be honest...Maria is more pleasant to look at for two hours than any politician. 

So here's what to do.  Take the two candidates, have them choose a pro wrestler as their "sponsor" for the evening, and do a broadcast where the candidates talk about about the issues with other wrestlers in between regular matches. The show culminates in a tag-team match where the candidates and their sponsors battle it out for debate supremacy.  I would totally watch, and so would millions of uneducated voters who might actually learn something.