Statistics are weird

At one point, "Season Of The Witch" was the best movie of 2011


What's this? Are you actually complimenting a Nicolas Cage film?


Not exactly. I've never seen this movie, as you might guess. I'm simply pointing out how it's very important to dig into the scope of a statement before believing it, particularly when that statement is made in an advertisement.

I often hear things like "Pennies on the Dollar" and "A fraction of the cost" when people are trying to sell me something. They don't mention the fact that 99 is a number of pennies, and 99 pennies on the dollar isn't a dramatic savings. 99% is also a fraction...and 99% of the cost is also less than earth-shattering.

So, when I hear a commercial for a movie claiming to be the "best movie of the year" and it's only April...my Bunk Alarm goes off. In the grander scheme of things, the most entertaining movies tend to come out in the summer, when kids are out of school, people are taking vacations, and going to drive-ins and whatnot, seeing more movies. Typically, the "best" movies come out late in the year, so they're fresh in the minds of Oscar voters. The leftover crap comes out in the first 4 months of the year, when nobody cares about movies. Being the "best movie" of the leftover crap shouldn't really be much of a selling point, but it was, in the case of some new movie that's coming out soon...I forget which one, and can't be bothered to look it up.

So, in order to hyperbolically make my point, today's Sametime Status points out that at one point, "Season of the Witch" in all of its 6% Tomatometer Glory (That's dreadful, by the way...lower than either "Birdemic" or "Plan 9", but higher than "Deadfall") was technically the best movie of 2011. Simply because it was the ONLY mainstream film that came out the first week of 2011. Its reign lasted a single week, as "The Green Hornet" came out the following Friday and quickly and mercifully erased it from the world's memory.


"Deadfall"? That's your benchmark for bad movies?


Well, no...but it was a rousing 0% Tomatometer clunker thrown in by my boy Cage. Which both serves to illustrate my point on the "Best movie of the year" and segue to the important news of the day...

Nicolas Cage Was Arrested in New Orleans last Friday. I didn't read the article, but allegedly, Cage was arrested in connection with a confidence scheme in which he and his agents would be hired by film directors under the guise that Cage was a good actor. This charade had been ongoing for years, and cost Hollywood untold millions of dollars. The damage to the psychology of theater-goers everywhere may never be the same. The story only gets better when Cage was bailed out of jail by the infamous "Dog The Bounty Hunter." I'm actually not making that part up.