Vroom!

"I did as little work as possible to get my car to run imperceptibly faster!"


Uhm....good for you?


Good for the person stopped at the red light next to me.


Him too.


So, you've probably seen lots of cars with various decals on the windows for performance modifications the owners have made to their cars. For most of those people, modding the cars is a hobby and it entertains them, causing no harm to most people except making them listen to a car that now sounds like a high-pitched fart due to the high-flow exhaust system you mounted on, neglecting the fact that the catalytic converter causes the majority of the exhaust backpressure, and that their engine was probably tuned to a certain amount of backpressure which now may or may not exist because of the new exhaust which won't increase your performance because the engine is now out of tune.

Anyway...when you buy these performance mods, they often (or so I'm told) come with stickers that you can put on your windows to prove to everyone else driving that you're not only a high roller, but your car might now go slightly faster than it did when you drove it off the lot. Go you. I drove up next to a car not long ago that had one sticker in the window for a mod well done. It was for an improved air filter they had installed from a brand we'll call "N&K". This company makes high-flow air filters which are remarkably easy to install. There is little more to the process than removing the old air filter (which all auto manufacturers make easy to remove because it's a consumable) and dropping in their new one. Voila! Your car now has slightly less trouble breathing and can possible have an extra 5% horsepower or so which you'll never notice while driving. In fact, I have one on my car...but mostly because this filter type lasts about 10x longer than a traditional paper one, so I don't have to remember to change it all the time.

The fact remains that this particular driver was so proud of installing the "N&K" air filter that he put the sticker up in his window. I'm proud of him. He still drives a beat to crap old junker, but at least it has 5 horsepower it didn't before he went to work on it.