Fewer Than Fifty Shades

For Halloween, I’m wearing different colored shoes!


Oh that wacky Jeremy.  Always coming up with Halloween costumes that make the lamest people say, "wow...that's pretty lame."  


Well, in this case, that's really not what's happening.  I recently discovered that the shoes I'm wearing today don't match.


How hard is this, you moron?  You find two shoes that are the same in your closet, then you put them on.  People usually figure this out at some point before kindergarten.   


Also not the point!

I am, in fact, wearing a matched pair of shoes.  They are a pair of brown leather casual shoes that I purchased recently to replace an identical pair that wore out since I wear them to work any day I wear brown pants, which is approximately 50% of the time.  I like them.  So much so that this is at least the third or forth pair of them that I've had, and I've largely stopped paying much attention to them.  When the old pair is done, I go to the same store I've always gotten them in, making sure to have my 30% off card that they send me in the mail, find them in my size and go on with life.  That's exactly what happened not long ago. 

As it turns out, one of the shoes is slightly lighter in color than the other. 

I didn't notice this at the time, or on any of the other times I've worn these particular shoes...which has probably been around a dozen times now.  But for some odd reason, I noticed it this morning, and will never again not notice it.  My shoes don't match.  None of you would have known this if I hadn't said anything.  Oh well.  I'll have to leave for a week to overcome my disappointment in myself. 


Well, that part was partially true.  Jeremy's going to be on a business trip for the rest of the week.  As such, Jeremy Is In The Office will be out of the office, returning next Tuesday, November 8th with all new Sametime Goodness for you all.  Have a good week, and don't eat too much candy. 

Mouse Manufacturer Not A Sponsor

First task of the day: Shopping for a new mouse  

Sounds like a great day.  Jeremy loves new electronics!  

So, let's go ahead and start things off by saying that my work computer leaves a little to be desired.  Sure, it started out as a pretty nice piece of hardware back when I first got it, but that was more than 4 years ago now, and it's been used pretty continuously 9-12 hours a day since then...minus weekends.  It's now slow and outdated, a little inundated in software updates and hardware deterioration.  It happens, which is why work computers tend to get replaced every 3 years or so.  The "Or So" being key in my case.  

It should also be noted here that I ordered a new battery for my work laptop 15 days ago, since the battery is among the pieces of hardware that are deteriorating.  I got an email on monday saying that, the IT Team is sorry for any inconvenience, but ordering my new laptop battery will take longer than expected.  

But that's beside the point. 

Yesterday afternoon, my mouse died.  It was a wireless mouse, so I had just assumed that the battery was done, and one AA later, I'd be back in mousey business.  After a longer-than-necessary search through my desk, I came to the realization that I didn't have any AA batteries at work, so it would be a day before my mouse issues were sorted out.  In the meantime, I can make use of my computer's touch pad and other assorted means of computer navigation.  Not a problem.  

It became a problem this morning when I brought in the last two AA batteries I own and plugged one of them into my mouse.  Bubkes.  (Yes, that's the proper spelling...I looked that crap up)  So, as it turns out, the battery was not the source of my mouse failure issues.  I tried a couple other common solutions to reactivate it, pulling the USB dongle and reinserting, wiggling the power switch, smacking the mouse a few times, turning my computer off and on again...all to no avail.  To the internets I go, searching for a new mouse that I can buy locally on my lunch break...preferably one near a deli.  

As I type this, I sit next to my shiny new mouse, which works flawlessly, and a receipt for the $23 it cost me to replace the old piece of crap which now resides in the garbage can outside my office.  If only I could do the same with this piece of crap computer...

Apple Omelette Sounds Horrible

For breakfast, apple > butternut squash  

I don't know...I think a little squash might make a nice addition to a nice omelette.  With some Asiago and saffron threads, perhaps?  Sprinkled with truffle oil, of course.

Nobody has ever made that before, and you may have just made me hungry.  

Anyway, today's Sametime Status has more to do with a little half-event that happened recently.  As you may be aware, I tend to wake up and get out the door to go to work fairly quickly.  This is partially because there's no real point waiting around in the morning, partially because the faster I get out of bed and into the shower, the faster I wake up, and partially because if I leave the house five minutes later than I do, I get stuck behind school buses for 83% of my commute.  

That's beside the point. 

As you may also be aware, I had a mini-feud with the cafeteria at work not long ago regarding the cost of iced tea, and whether or not it should increase significantly based on flavor.  Well, since then, I have moved my office back to the building with the Adorably Tiny Cafeteria Thing In My Building, and I've been led to believe that a new company is taking over both cafeterias (for the benefit of lower cost, and almost certainly not to the benefit of increased quality), but the memory of that feud remains.  As such, I tend to bring my breakfast to work rather than procure it here.  Usually, that takes the form of a banana.  

Unless it's Apple Season.  

For the last few weeks, my daily banana has been replaced by my daily apple.  It's crispy, easily transportable, and delicious, making it pretty ideal for breakfast while poring over the latest email influx.  

Normally, my supply sits in a bowl on my kitchen counter.  But, on certain occasions where I didn't finish putting all of the groceries away before I got bored with putting the groceries away, the apples sit in a plastic bag inside a grocery bag on my kitchen counter along with whatever else hasn't been put away yet.  Don't worry, it's nothing immediately perishable...just things like apples that have no trouble sitting at room temperature.  

Anyway, not long ago, in my usual morning haze and in a rush to get out the door before School Bus Time, I reach down into the grocery bag to grab the plastic bag of apples.  I pull out a butternut squash that I bought because I saw a video online that had a different way of preparing butternut squash that looked good, so I wanted to try it.  I decided to reach back into the bag and try it again, because raw butternut squash is probably not as good a breakfast idea as a shiny apple.  Haven't tried it, though.  If you try my omelette idea, let me know how it goes.   

They Made A Documentary Or Something

For Cubs fans, winning the world series would be the greatest thing since sliced bread   

Chicago is quite well known for their bread.  Though usually, it's at the bottom of a deep-dish pizza, but that's hardly worth mentioning.  

So I was made aware of something fascinating yesterday.  Baseball is still happening!  Here we are in this semi-mythical time where all of the major sports are apparently playing.  Hockey season started a couple weeks ago, the Football season is in full swing, Basketball starts up this week (I was made aware of that even more recently than the baseball thing), and Baseball begins its World Series this week.  I was surprised that baseball was still happening...I would have thought they would have sorted that out by now, but apparently they need a couple more weeks.  

Anyway, this year's World Series features the Cleveland Indians versus the Chicago Cubs.  That's not a joke.  

The Cleveland Indians (and why I've typed "Clevelant" both times so far, I will never know...thank you, Spellcheck) last won the World Series in 1948, which I found at least a little confusing, since I thought they had won in the 1989 season.  As it turns out, they merely won a divisional playoff tiebreaker game, and lost the American League Championship Series to Chicago.  Box scores and particularly statistics for star pitcher Ricky Vaughn are difficult to locate.  The Indians made it to the World Series the following year, again on the strength of Vaughn's right arm, but strangely again, no statistics for the following series are available.  Regardless, it is a fantastically long championship drought.   

But it pales in comparison to the Championship Drought of the Chicago Cubs.  

Highly Reliable Sources have informed me that the Chicago Cubs' current streak of championship-less seasons is the longest in all of North America's major professional sports.  The last time the Cubs lifted Lord Stanley's Cup, The Vince Lombardi Trophy, The Larry O'Brien Championship Trophy, The Commissioner's Trophy (Seriously...that's the name...awful) was in 1908, when precisely none of the current roster's grandparents were alive.  I mean...I'm guessing...but I'll bet a dollar that I'm right.  

Another thing that didn't exist in 1908...sliced bread.  

As we're well aware, sliced bread was invented in 1928, and it was the greatest thing since bread was wrapped.  So, quite literally, if the Chicago Cubs were to win the World Series this year it would be the greatest thing for Cubs fans since sliced bread.