Where's A Coal Mine When You Need One?

My little feathered alarm clock needs to learn what it means to be on vacation

That's what you get for making your friends watch Birdemic 2: The Resurrection.  Plus, your friends all hate you now. 

Once upon last week, dreary.  While I slumbered a little weary, 

After watching a bunch of Netflix'ed forgotten lore. 

While I snoozed, gently napping, suddenly there came a tapping, 

as of someone gently rapping.  Rapping on my windows...or...

Maybe on the air conditioner, what a chore.

Only this...and nothing more.  

Except for the fact that the noise didn't stop.  It just got a little annoying that here we are at 6AM, and something is knocking against the window to my bedroom, and it really needed to stop.  After a little while of this, I got up to see what it was that was making this relatively minor amount of racket, but still loud and repetitive enough to be annoying and keep me awake.  I flew to the window and threw open the blinds (wait...wrong poem...sorry), and just outside the bedroom window, I see this little guy:

He's adorable!  

So there he is, perched happily on top of the screen in the window, paying no attention to the man behind the curtain.  That would be me.  So he sits there for a couple seconds, then fluffs his feathers, jumps up and starts flapping his wings and pecking at the window.  Yes...this little nimrod is fighting with his own reflection in my bedroom window at 6AM in the frickin' morning.  

If this just happened once, it would be a really cute and entertaining story that I would be melting hearts with right now.  As it stands, it's become something a little more sinister.  My new pet here (I named him "Rodney", or "Rod" for short, after the main character in "Birdemic: Shock and Terror," and perhaps coincidentally, the lead actor in Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds," has become obsessed with his own white whale.  Although, in this case, that white whale has taken the form of a little yellow canary that shows up every time he does on the other side of my bedroom window.  He apparently has a standing appointment at 6AM every morning to do battle with this evil mastermind, and he's pretty relentless about fighting his nemesis.  

The problem arises when I'm on vacation, like I was a little bit last week...you know...4th of July and everything (Incidentally, I'm typing this just fine because I still have all 10 fingers, thanks for asking).  I didn't want to be awake at 6:00 in the morning.  Rod had other ideas.  Stupid canary...vacation means we don't have to get up.  I'm not saying you're not allowed to fight with yourself in the window, just wait until 9AM to do it.