Do They Still Need Syrup?

Now I’m too nerdy to watch sitcoms.  It’s a sad day for comedy

At this point, I don't know if there's anything left that you're not too nerdy for.  I think maybe this is a sign.  

So last night, I decided to watch a little TV, and my remote alit upon the popular sitcom "Modern Family."  If you're not familiar with the show, becoming familiar with the show is left as an exercise for the reader.  What is important is that there was a segment of the show devoted to a series of poorly-conceived inventions created by one of the characters.  I forget what they all were, but one had to do with a Flaming Toaster, a coffee maker was involved, and another dealt with the concept of self-flipping pancakes.  The idea there was that if you add popcorn kernels to the pancake batter, the pancakes would flip themselves during the cooking process, and the spatula would be made entirely obsolete.  This would be Remarkably Unfortunate For Some.  I am forced to Call Bunk on this comedic gag. 

Here's my problem.

You only have one?

This popcorn-pancake (Or "Flipjack") invention has no prayer of working properly.  And that has nothing to do with the fact that you now have crunchy popcorn embedded in your fluffy pancakes.  It has to do with SCIENCE!  So, the best temperature for cooking pancakes is between 350 and 375 degrees F.  If you didn't know this, you know it now.  Everyone knows that if you turn the heat up too high on your griddle, you end up with black, charred, and bitter-tasting pancakes.  Ew.  Or else, you don't cook them as long, and the inside doesn't get cooked properly and you lose all fluffiness.  We all know that Fluffiness Is A Good Thing.  So, whether you realized it or not, you tend to cook your pancakes somewhere in that temperature range.  

Popcorn pops at 450 deg F.  Way beyond anything acceptable for pancake cooking.  So, you can't have it both ways.  Either your popcorn pops and flips your disgusting pancakes, or your delicious pancakes are cooked properly, but have rock-hard popcorn kernels embedded in them. 

My main problem, of course, is that I knew both of these numbers right off the top of my head and right in the middle of sitcom time.  I became more or less obsessed with the fact that proper pancake and popcorn temperatures differ by at least 75 degrees and I missed the next joke.  I need to stop watching sitcoms with scientific inaccuracies in them...or else, sitcom makers need to pay more attention to these types of things.  I pretty much doubt either of these are going to be the case.