Monday, January 21, 2013

The Next Fad In Elective Surgery


“Too bad you never got that tracheotomy” – Actual Conversation


Uhm...you know, you often have some bizarre conversation with people, but this one might be about the craziest one yet.  Anything that causes somebody to get a tracheotomy is usually a bad thing. 


I would tend to agree, but it made perfect sense at the time.

So many of you are probably familiar with the great George Carlin's sketch about Thing You Never See And Hear (Warning...link contains strong language, which should have been patently evident at the mere mention of the name "Carlin").  Well, I had one of those types of events at a hockey game recently.  During a hockey game, there are two intermissions, during which time is passed by the playing of pee-wee hockey and driving of the Zamboni.  (Technically, "Ice Resurfacer"...Zamboni is a brand name much like saying Kleenex instead of "Tissue")    While this is entertaining for about a minute and a half, there remains about 10 minutes of extra time to kill, during which people come up with various things to do.  There are concession stands, rest rooms, other people to talk to, and little games to play in the stands.  

One of the little games played recently involves the throwing of popcorn into somebody's waiting mouth.  This is more difficult than you may think due to the simply atrocious aerodynamic properties of popcorn.  So, we're playing our little game here, and nobody's "scored" yet, even through the time-honored method of tossing an entire handful of popcorn at the target, causing a bit of a mess.  Anyway...at one point during our game, a piece of popcorn hit the target directly in the throat, causing one of the gamers to announce "Too bad you never got that tracheotomy." 

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