Monday, February 29, 2016

Orange Jell-O Time!



Somehow containing my urge to start leaping uncontrollably 


Yeah, you know it, Jeremy.  Everyone is quite aware of your overriding urge to jump up, jump up and get down.  


Really?  House of Pain?  


Don't look at me.  You're the one making stupid jokes about Leap Year.  


Fair enough. 

So, today is February 29th.  The day of the year set aside for the fact that it takes the earth an extra 6 hours to orbit the sun every 365 days.  It's also the day that you get to hear the same old tired jokes about how young certain people are when today is their birthday, so they age at 1/4 the rate everyone else does.  We get it.  

It's also a huge capitalist scam for people who are paid an annual salary.  The companies we work for get a whole extra day's work out of us for nothing.  It's pretty much the other side of Ebenezer Scrooge's whine about giving Bob Cratchit the day off for Christmas.  "That's a poor excuse for picking a man's pocket every 25th of December."  It's the same thing, but it happens roughly 1/4 as often.   

Thursday, February 25, 2016

They Sound Less Magical That Way



Am I the only one to notice that mermaids aren’t fish at all?  They’re half whale


Mermaids aren't half anything.  They're entirely fictitious.  


Tell that to Mermaid MelissaShe will likely beg to differ.  

Anyway, what's important here...


For certain definitions of "Important"...


...is that common lore about mermaids is entirely bogus.  I have proof!  

See, a common defining characteristic of see life is the orientation of the tail, or "caudal fin."  Caudal is from the Latin meaning "Tail."  That is the fin that is commonly found on the back of a fish and or marine mammal.  In every case of "Fish," the tail is positioned in a vertical orientation, meaning that propulsion is created by the fish moving the tail from side to side.  In every case of marina mammal, (whales, porpoises) the tail is positioned horizontally, so the fish moves by moving the tail up and down.  

Here is a visual description of my point.  
Fish:
Whale:  
 And when you compare this to the standard mermaid:


You can plainly see that the mermaid's tail is positioned horizontally, which makes sense.  A mermaid's propulsion method is commonly depicted as an up and down motion, which would correspond to a standard set of human knees and hips, and the direction they tend to go when moving.  So, it's plain to see that a mermaid is not, in fact, half fish.  Mermaids are clearly half mammal and half mammal.  

Case closed. 




Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Anybody Watch "Archer"?



Today, I was made aware of the amazing word, “Superblimp”


That's fantastic!  Think of all the aerial coverage of notable sporting events we can have now!  


Indeed.  Officially called Hybrid Airship, the superblimp is set for its grand unveiling sometime soon, according to co-developers Hybrid Enterprises and Lockheed Martin.  This amazingly huge blimp is being targeted for use not circling sporting venues, unfortunately, but remote areas where materials can be flown in or out in great volumes with ease.  This is important, for example, in areas where infrastructure can not support heavy plane travel or there is minimal availability of roads and train tracks.  The Hybrid Airship is filling an important niche in worldwide air transport which can not be filled through any conventional means.  

And COME ON!  It's called Superblimp!