A Broken Printer?! What A Deal!

Garage Sale outside my office today only!  Cheap stuff cheap!  

Only the cheapest stuff for Jeremy's customers!  

Well folks.  It's the end of an era.   If I've learned nothing else while watching the opening credits sequence from "Watchmen" as many times as I have, it's that the times, they are a changin'.  While the song is a little deeper in its own meaning, and there was a double-meaning in the movie in that there was a divergence in reality which started somewhere in the 1960s, for me, it means my office is moving.  

Sure, it's not the first time I've had to move offices, but every time I do, it's a little sad to note that my entire career up until this point has amounted to a computer and a small stack of boxes.  

And about 60 pounds of loose change that you made me carry out to your car.  

This time in particular, it's even more sad, though, for several reasons.  First, I'm saying goodbye to having my own door.  I will be moving to a cubicle, which sucks right out loud.  I've had cubicles before, and having an actual office with a door is very much preferable.  But, such is life.   Secondly, I'm actually moving to a different building, which means saying an equally fond farewell to The Adorably Tiny Cafeteria Thing In My Building.  With that, of course, means leaving my arch nemesis, the Famed Toaster of Hades, to its own devices.  Hopefully, somebody will take up the mantle and protect the unsuspecting public from its wrath.  Yes, I will be moving to the building here that has the actual cafeteria.  It will be a time of change and I'm not sure what I'll do with that.  I'll probably learn where the toaster is in that cafeteria and use that to toast my bread in the morning.  I'm just not sure.  

So, here I sit, the final hours ticking away in my mostly packed-up office, thinking of all the good times we've had here.  Looking forward to the good times we'll have in the new place.  At least the new office has a window within sight, so I can actually see outside once in a while.  

It's just too bad you won't be seeing it for a while.  

Also true!  In a bout of crazy random happenstance, I'll be away while all of my stuff migrates to my new digs.  I'll be on vacation next week, so I'll miss out on all the fun my neighbors are going to have setting up their new spaces.  When I come back, they'll be busily working away while I unpack four boxes and a laptop bag.  I'll be richer by about 60 pounds of loose change, though!  

Jeremy Is In The Office will be Out Of The Office from August 1 through 9, returning on monday, August 10th with all new Sametime Goodness.  Enjoy your summer! 

Only $30? AMAZING!

Yes, somebody finally invented a belt sander for your skin! 

 Well, it's about time.  I've been waiting so long to be able to...uhm...what is it this thing does again?

It exfoliated your skin and makes you feet smooth instead of dry and calloused.  

Is it really that important that you need power tools for it?

Apparently.  

You see, not all that long ago, when people ha dry skin on their feet, they had to shave it away the old fashioned way: Using A Rasp.  But who has time for all of that back and forth filing on your foot skin to shave away that unwanted skin?  A better solution was required!  

For certain definitions of "required."  

Along comes a brand new product that takes away all of that hard work using proven belt-sander technology.  A swiftly rotating barrel of abrasive on a stick will take care of all of your dry skin issues for you in a breeze!  Say hello to Micro Pedi!  

Also, as it turns out, there are Other Products which are Just Like That One, and I'm more than a little confused as to why All Of These need to exist.  But they do, so you'd be foolish not to buy a lifetime supply right now.  

Jeremy already has a lifetime supply of foot belt sanders.  He has zero.  

Dinner For Days!

You use the side of your index finger more than you think  

And just what if I think I use it an awful lot?

You don't, but that's hardly the point.  You still use it more than that.   

I've learned recently that one of the most used portions of my hand is the side of my right index finger.  It's amazingly useful when turning the key to my office, when putting stuff in my pocket, when writing something down, when squeezing a bottle of shampoo, when carrying my laptop to a meeting, when washing dishes, when getting the last potato chip out of the bag at lunch, when turning the steering wheel of my car, and probably a few other things I'm forgetting about because they're just too numerous.  

How did I discover all of these wonderful uses for the side of my finger, you ask?

I totally didn't ask.  This is entirely on you.

By getting a giant blister on the side of my index finger!  

Of course, I did this in pretty much the manliest way possible.  

That's actually the shocking part of the story, really.  

I was using my Bear Paws to shred my home-made pulled pork!  These things are really cool.  They make you feel a little like Wolverine in that you have near-indestructible claw extensions on your otherwise perfectly normal hands.  I've never pulled an entire pork shoulder before without these things, but it doesn't take much to figure out that they make the work an awful lot faster an easier than doing it with a knife and fork.  They're really pretty awesome.  However, depending on how you hold them (correctly versus incorrectly, apparently), if you use these things non-stop for about an hour, pulling over 7 pounds of delicious pork shoulder, you can develop a blister on the side of your index finger.  You don't even notice it until later when you pop the blister open while washing the dishes.  After that, it's pretty much the worst thing ever.