I Need To Stop Reading The News

So I understand the Governor of New Jersey has a bridge he’d like to sell…

But who'd want to buy it?  It's in New Jersey.

I guess that's tangential to the point.  What we have going on recently in the world of manufactured political scandal is BridgeGate!  Or WaterBridge!  Or whatever moronic conglomeration of words involving "Water" and/or "Gate" people use to name manufactured political scandals these days.

For those unawares, and to be unawares, you need to be living in a cave and probably not reading self-proclaimed comedy blags on the internets, the governor of New Jersey, who is inexplicably compared to Kate Upton In This Article, didn't know that somebody on his staff managed to close some lanes on a bridge to New York.  This led to the horrible tragedy of people being late in New York.  The reason these lanes were closed is apparently, the mayor of the town the bridge is in didn't support the governor's reelection...perhaps because the governor is from the opposite political party.  

So, this is the political equivalent of putting somebody's hand in a bucket of warm water while they're sleeping, and it's all the governor's fault...if the over-sensationalized media are to be believed.  Conversely, if the other side of the over-sensationalized media are to be believed, the over-sensationalized media are only focusing on this story to draw your attention away from the REAL scandal of some other over-sensationalized nonsense that's being done by the other political party.  I hope that sentence made sense, but I can't be bothered to proofread.  

So, the governor had a press conference where he had to apologize a few times and say that he's sad about 83 million times, and all will be forgiven...until, of course, the governor actually tries to do something silly like...you know....govern.  Then, his political opponents will be all too eager to jump all over BridgeGate as an example of how the governor is ruining the state/country/economy/way of life/freedom/Christmas and they will proceed to do nothing.  

Ladies and Gentlemen....the current state of politics.