I Also Don't Know Where Bubble Gum Fits Into This

We’ve been doing it backwards!  You should give people your name so at least they know why they’re getting their butt kicked

Or at least who it is who's doing the kicking.

Well, I'm going with the assumption that it's deserved.  Anyway, today's Sametime Status deals with the timeless expression "Kick butt and take names."  There are variations, but this is a family Blag.  This phrase is nonsense.  Let's examine.

First of all, it stands to reason that you really should have somebody's name before kicking their butt.  If we start off with the premise that a good butt-kicking is in order for somebody, and you're going to take on this task yourself, you should make sure that you're kicking the butt of the correct person.  Presumably, this person has wronged you in some way, so in order to get the appropriate compensation, you need to verify the butt prior to kicking.  See, if you go around just randomly kicking people's butts, you not only look like a jerk, but you'll probably get arrested.  So once you have the butt's identity confirmed, then and only then is it time to start kicking.  So it stands to reason that you have no need to take names after kicking butt, because you really should have the name in the first place. 

Next, comes the central premise of today's Status.  If this person has no idea who you are, they can't possibly piece together why it is that you're kicking their butt.  If the person works in some form of customer service, they can probably make an educated guess, or if it's Nicolas Cage, he can pretty much narrow it down to his film-making career, but failing that, it's just too much of a crapshoot.  We've all done things in our lives worthy of a butt-kicking, but unless somebody offers an explanation, you really can't be sure, and the message is lost.  If you introduce yourself, it's safe to assume the person then knows not only who you are, but what they did that required a butt kicking. 

So, to summarize.  In order to achieve maximum results, you should not "kick butt and take names," but rather, "Kick butt and give name."  It just makes more sense.