Today, Rebecca Black begins her quest to ruin 167 million more pairs of ears.
If you have access to the internets, do yourself a favor and destroy your computer now, before you're even tempted to do this.
So, you all remember not long ago, when the worst song ever made made its way to Youtube, right? At one point, the song was removed from the site (in a maneuver referred to as a "Mercy Flush"), but not before over 167 million people bore witness to the unholy tragedy that is "Friday" by Rebecca Black. Strictly speaking, Ms. Black had very little to do with the song that was written by some no-talent hacks in a music studio for horrifying stage mothers who think their kids have the talent to be the next great pop star. That's beside the point. The point is that "Friday" was unleashed on the world, and we've never been the same since.
What ensued was a mass cultural delusion that Rebecca Black had any talent whatsoever. This is not the case. She's a pretty lousy singer who requires the cliched benefits of Autotune in order to resemble singing on key. Proof of this can be found in the Unplugged Version Of The Song.
For the sake of your health, do NOT click on that link.
Following this wave of media attention, Rebecca became a star. It's not clear why, but she apparently now is a worthy pop icon, despite the fact that she's not good at the thing that made her famous. In fact, she's famous for being bad at it...but today at 8PM, she releases her second single, and God help us all.
Look for it on Youtube later tonight! It's going to be a wreck.
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