FREEDOM!!!

Hooray for free internets!  Wait…that’s not what it means?  

Sadly, we don't all get internets for free now.  That would be useful.  

Yeah, I guess Net Neutrality is a little more precise of a definition of what happened.  They got that one right.  Well, the government has actually managed to do something (only took 9 months or so) to preserve neutrality of internet speeds.  This, despite protests from "concerned citizens" Comcast and Verizon.  

You still have to pay your cable bill.  

I know...it's at least a little depressing. 

You know what's not depressing?  Vacation! 

Too bad you're not taking one.

Well, yes...but I'm still going to be away.  I'll be away next week, traveling on business, so there will be no new Sametime Statuses.  Try to control your tears.  

Tears of joy?

We'll return on monday, March 9th with all new goodness.  

Jeremy Is In The Office will be Out Of The Office next week, but he will be reading and responding to emails.  Feel free to bug him all you want.  

I Like My Car. Otherwise, I Would Have Taken His Door Off

Pro Tip: Upon realizing, after the fact, that you can’t see out of your frost-covered windshield, the middle of the road is the perfect place to stop and scrape 

Wow, that's helpful.  I can't imagine how much time I would have wasted pulling into a parking lot or driveway or something.  

Winter sucks. 

It's not only cold and snowy, but it makes people do stupid things.  Like This Guy who drives around with snow on the roof of his car because he can't be bothered to brush it off.  Sure, it's more convenient for you, and nuts to the people behind you who have to see through your portable snow storm and possible avalanche into the middle of the road.  

People also don't bother making sure they can see out of their windshield before they start driving to their destination because hey...they're very important people with very important things that demand their attention.  They don't have time for silly things like visibility.  So you get a couple different variations.  You get the "spray washer fluid on the window and hope for the best" approach, the "scrape a 4 inch hole in your direct line of sight" approach, and the "the defroster will get there eventually" blooming flower of melted ice.  These are all stupid, and I hate you for doing them.  

Well, for those of you who realize a little too late that you are "that guy" and you actually can't see out of your windshield after you've set forth on your journey, they do make ice scrapers.  And no, there's no need to pull over to the side of the road once you realize your mistake.  You don't need to turn off into a driveway or in any way remove your car from the proper right-of-way.  You can just stop your car directly in the middle of the road, pop the door open, and start scraping away. 

At least that's what I gathered from the idiot on my way to work this morning. 

I Got Your Oscar Right Here

Wow, that Oscars after-party was amazing…I mean…I’m guessing

Awe geeze...Jeremy watched another awards show.  This doesn't end well.

As you might expect, I was not nominated for an Academy Award this year.  Then again, neither was Neil Patrick Harris, and they let him host the thing, so I guess it's okay.  As a consequence of the lack of support from the Academy...

...not to mention Jeremy's complete lack of any actual work in the film making industry other than writing a single movie pitch on a Blag...

...I was not invited to the Oscars ceremony held last night.  It wasn't all that surprising, I guess.  I really just question all of their judgements since 1995, when they gave an Oscar to Nicolas Friggin Cage for crying out loud.  Seriously, Academy?  What's the big idea there?  

I digress. 

So, one of the main reasons people like winning Oscars is the After Parties they get to attend with their shiny new gold trophies.  Based on the number of people who were interviewed on TV looking at least fairly intoxicated, I would imagine that the after parties are pretty wild affairs.  

I wouldn't know.