Attention, makers of “Sharknado”...“Bird Flu Bee Hive.” You’re welcome
Coming soon, to theaters in all the towns where people you hate live...
So, we're all familiar with "The Asylum" by now, right? They're the bargain basement film production company responsible for trashterpieces like "Snakes on a Train," "Mega Shark vs. Crocasaurus," "Mega Python vs Gateroid," and of course, "Sharknado." Many of these films spend their lives going direct to video or being broadcast on the SyFy channel, formerly known as SciFi before they morally had to remove any semblance of the word "science" from their name.
Well, after the smash hit that was "Sharknado," my friends at "The Asylum"...
Who else can't believe it's taken Jeremy this long to use the phrase "My friends at the asylum?" Show of hands?
...are scrambling to find their next great idea. The only thing they seem to have come up with, aside from 13/13/13 (The shocking sequel to the apocalyptic thriller "12/12/12"), Alone For Christmas, The Bell Witch Haunting, Wonderland, and Atilla, is a sequel named...and I wish I was making this up..."Sharknado 2, The Second One." Yes, the well is running dry. So, I've taken it upon myself to supply them with the next big thing, because that's just the kind of guy I am.
Sadistic? Evil? Sociopathic?
Generous with my creativity! The idea is Genius. The single greatest threat surrounding mankind is the upcoming Bird Flu Pandemic...everyone knows this. People are also currently scared by the swarms of Giant Killer Hornets currently marauding their way through China. So, combine the two into one massively horrifying film spectacular! A queen bee gets infected with Bird Flu while stinging a rogue chicken that escaped from being culled. The queen infects the rest of the hive, and Bird Flu-laced hornets proceed to wreak havoc over the entire global population, swarming and spreading deadly Bird Flu everywhere. The film practically writes itself. So, when can I expect my first royalty check, and how soon after that can I put this idea on my IMBD page?
No comments:
Post a Comment