It's never seemed that hard to me...

Apparently, the Romans were really bad at making candles


I think this is politically incorrect...but I'm not sure


So I was in a store not long ago looking for scented candles (as I am wont to do), and I came across what I thought was a new style. It was called "Roman Candle" and it looked bright and festive, so I thought I'd give it a try. It had some sort of warning on it, but I ignored it like the warnings on all the scented candles I buy. It's usually something about not leaving it unattended or not lighting indoors or using a blow-torch to light it...you know...the usual stuff.


Kids aren't allowed to sit "Indian Style" anymore...it's called "Pretzel Style." I'm actually not making that up. So why are we allowed to buy "Roman" Candles?


So I light the candle in my room, and much to my surprise, it starts shooting stuff all over the place and filling the room with smoke. It was really quite distracting.


Not long ago, all the NCAA teams with Native American-themed mascots had to change them.


So I was a little shocked at this turn of events. The Romans were remarkably famous for their architecture and aqueducts and ability to build long-lasting roads. I'm just surprised that they couldn't figure out how to make a nice slow, clean-burning scented candle for me. It apparently took all the way to the 1700's (The "Yankee" days) before somebody could make a good candle. So I think from now on, I'm going to be buying the new Yankee-American style scented candles instead of the old-fashioned Roman version.


Jeremy and I, along with Miracle Posting Inc. would like to wish everyone a safe and explosive Fourth of July full of swimming pools and all the hamburgers you could want. "Jeremy Is In The Office" will be Out of the Office starting tomorrow and returning Tuesday, July 7th with more Fun and Frivolity.