A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing
Good job, Jeremy. You should be proud.
Speaking of proud, a couple people can be proud of themselves for solving yesterday's little puzzley thing. Although Evil Jeremy's solution was perfectly valid, it wasn't quite what I was going for.
So how's it done?
With runners on 1st and 2nd base, the batter hits a fair popup, and is immediately called out via the Infield Fly Rule (1). While the ball is in the air, the runner on first takes off and overtakes the runner on second base and is called out (2). The fly ball comes down hits the runner on second base, and he is out by interference (3). It takes a couple of brain-dead moments for this to happen, but by rule, it is possible.
In keeping with the theme to today's Sametime Status, here's an amusing intro to the Drew Carey show featuring "The Gates" by DaVinci's Notebook. Happy Friday everyone!
Friday, July 31, 2009
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Why am I back in 'A' Ball?
Fun Baseball Fact! It's possible to hit into a Triple Play without the defense ever touching the ball.
That can't be true, can it?
In fact it is...and we're celebrating the MLB non-waiver trade deadline (which is tomorrow) with a special fun obscure baseball rules quiz for fun and prizes!
Prizes?
"The Satisfaction of Knowing You Did Your Best" is a prize...of sorts.
A pretty weaksauce one.
So, all you have to do is figure out how a baseball player can hit into a triple play without the defense ever touching the ball, and you win! Limit one entry per household. (Here's a hint: It's never happened in an MLB game.) Answer will be posted tomorrow.
So how's the trade deadline looking?
I'd like to officially renounce my fandom of the Toronto Blue Jays, pending the firing of General Manager J.P. Ricciardi. I was made aware recently that we are now in Year 8 of Ricciardi's 5 year plan to rebuild the team to a contender, and we're no closer to the end of that road. Sure, we've had some injuries along the way and a couple prospects haven't panned out, but we've also sat through the signings (and subsequent releasings) of B.J. Ryan and Frank Thomas. The Lyle Overbay trade was a bust, John-Ford Griffin and Jason Arnold are nowhere to be found, Vernon Wells and Alex Rios are playing well below their contracts, and we still don't have a shortstop worth posting here. I'm actually largely okay with most of that...but, when you go out in public and say that you essentially need to blow up the team and start over with new prospects by trading away not only the face of the franchise, but the greatest player the team has ever seen and the best pitcher in the game today...you've gone too far. So to the failed Ricciardi regime in Toronto, I say a hearty "No Thanks," and I'll rejoin the Jays' supporters when you're finally (and mercifully) gone.
That can't be true, can it?
In fact it is...and we're celebrating the MLB non-waiver trade deadline (which is tomorrow) with a special fun obscure baseball rules quiz for fun and prizes!
Prizes?
"The Satisfaction of Knowing You Did Your Best" is a prize...of sorts.
A pretty weaksauce one.
So, all you have to do is figure out how a baseball player can hit into a triple play without the defense ever touching the ball, and you win! Limit one entry per household. (Here's a hint: It's never happened in an MLB game.) Answer will be posted tomorrow.
So how's the trade deadline looking?
I'd like to officially renounce my fandom of the Toronto Blue Jays, pending the firing of General Manager J.P. Ricciardi. I was made aware recently that we are now in Year 8 of Ricciardi's 5 year plan to rebuild the team to a contender, and we're no closer to the end of that road. Sure, we've had some injuries along the way and a couple prospects haven't panned out, but we've also sat through the signings (and subsequent releasings) of B.J. Ryan and Frank Thomas. The Lyle Overbay trade was a bust, John-Ford Griffin and Jason Arnold are nowhere to be found, Vernon Wells and Alex Rios are playing well below their contracts, and we still don't have a shortstop worth posting here. I'm actually largely okay with most of that...but, when you go out in public and say that you essentially need to blow up the team and start over with new prospects by trading away not only the face of the franchise, but the greatest player the team has ever seen and the best pitcher in the game today...you've gone too far. So to the failed Ricciardi regime in Toronto, I say a hearty "No Thanks," and I'll rejoin the Jays' supporters when you're finally (and mercifully) gone.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Here comes the bus
"The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on." - Robert Bloch
That's pretty clever. Also remarkably true.
It also helps explain why I'm around a lot of smiley people all the time.
That's pretty clever. Also remarkably true.
It also helps explain why I'm around a lot of smiley people all the time.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
It's right here, Ray...It's looking at me
The vending machines are officially creepy
What horrifying snack did you get out of it this time?
Actually, that's not the point today. Today's Sametime Status deals with technology!
Vending machine technology has advanced quite a bit in recent years. Some of them have that belt thingy so that the machine doesn't drop your Coke from 6 feet up and make it spray all over you when you open it. Props to the guy who thought that one up.
Another fairly recent innovation in the world of automated snack distribution is the use of motion detectors. Most vending machines have lights so you can see the product you're about to purchase. These lights apparently use so much energy that it actually makes financial sense to retrofit a motion detector to the top of the vending machine and program circuitry so that the light will turn off if nobody has approached the vending machine in a certain amount of time. Forget the fact that you have a giant poorly-insulated refrigerator with a clear plastic front...you have to save the planet by turning off the light bulb inside.
So completely aside from the fact that these motion detectors have GOT to be worthless...they're kinda creepy, because they have a green light on them that turns on when motion is detected. I'll be walking down the hallway past the vending area and the little green lights turn on one at a time when they see me. Of course...maybe they're not motion detectors...maybe the vending machines are already linked to Skynet or something.
What horrifying snack did you get out of it this time?
Actually, that's not the point today. Today's Sametime Status deals with technology!
Vending machine technology has advanced quite a bit in recent years. Some of them have that belt thingy so that the machine doesn't drop your Coke from 6 feet up and make it spray all over you when you open it. Props to the guy who thought that one up.
Another fairly recent innovation in the world of automated snack distribution is the use of motion detectors. Most vending machines have lights so you can see the product you're about to purchase. These lights apparently use so much energy that it actually makes financial sense to retrofit a motion detector to the top of the vending machine and program circuitry so that the light will turn off if nobody has approached the vending machine in a certain amount of time. Forget the fact that you have a giant poorly-insulated refrigerator with a clear plastic front...you have to save the planet by turning off the light bulb inside.
So completely aside from the fact that these motion detectors have GOT to be worthless...they're kinda creepy, because they have a green light on them that turns on when motion is detected. I'll be walking down the hallway past the vending area and the little green lights turn on one at a time when they see me. Of course...maybe they're not motion detectors...maybe the vending machines are already linked to Skynet or something.
Monday, July 27, 2009
It's actually a ripoff
One thing's for sure. You're getting your money's worth out of today's Sametime Status
That's one great thing about this Blag...you do provide great value.
We're all about bringing the best in Sametime Status Message quality to you at the lowest price around.
I'm not so sure about "quality" but the price is right.
I've often tried to figure out how to make a living as a Sametime Status writer, but sadly, I haven't come up with a niche yet. I'm thinking I should compile all of my Sametime Statuses (especially Theme Weeks) and put out a book...or maybe turn it into a cartoon. People pay for those, right?
Oh yeah....even those stupid cavemen ended up with their own sitcom for a while. No reason you couldn't do it, too.
Coming soon: "Jeremy Is On Your TV"! It's gonna be a thing!
That's one great thing about this Blag...you do provide great value.
We're all about bringing the best in Sametime Status Message quality to you at the lowest price around.
I'm not so sure about "quality" but the price is right.
I've often tried to figure out how to make a living as a Sametime Status writer, but sadly, I haven't come up with a niche yet. I'm thinking I should compile all of my Sametime Statuses (especially Theme Weeks) and put out a book...or maybe turn it into a cartoon. People pay for those, right?
Oh yeah....even those stupid cavemen ended up with their own sitcom for a while. No reason you couldn't do it, too.
Coming soon: "Jeremy Is On Your TV"! It's gonna be a thing!
Friday, July 24, 2009
Next week is Old Home Week
What did the snail say when he was duct-taped to the top of a turtle? WHEEEEEEEEE!
That's almost as bad as the Skeleton Joke.
First of all, thank you. Secondly, the Skeleton Joke is awesome. Thirdly, today is "Tell An Old Joke Day!"
You're so old, you got to call 'Shotgun' on the Ark.
Not that kind of 'Old' joke. Something more like "What do you get when you have 20 lawyers up to their necks in cement? More Cement!"
How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb? One.
How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Hand him some sheet music.
Two fish swim into a cement wall. One turns to the other and says, "Dam."
Why do elephants wear green shoes? So they can hide in trees.
What do you call an 800 pound bear with ear muff? Anything you want...he can't hear you.
Who else has old jokes? It'll be a fun project for your Friday!
That's almost as bad as the Skeleton Joke.
First of all, thank you. Secondly, the Skeleton Joke is awesome. Thirdly, today is "Tell An Old Joke Day!"
You're so old, you got to call 'Shotgun' on the Ark.
Not that kind of 'Old' joke. Something more like "What do you get when you have 20 lawyers up to their necks in cement? More Cement!"
How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb? One.
How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Hand him some sheet music.
Two fish swim into a cement wall. One turns to the other and says, "Dam."
Why do elephants wear green shoes? So they can hide in trees.
What do you call an 800 pound bear with ear muff? Anything you want...he can't hear you.
Who else has old jokes? It'll be a fun project for your Friday!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
That seems unsafe
Forget the beetles. I'm moving my firewood.
But the commercial specifically told you not to move your firewood.
Yes, but since I don't get it, I'm not going to follow it.
Then the beetles win.
A new radio commercial has come into vogue lately about beetles. It's akin to the PSA's that still run in my old college town about saving the Black-Footed Ferret and the prairie dogs from extinction. The bottom line here is that you're not supposed to move your firewood. In fact, you're supposed to go to their website and electronically "sign" a pledge saying that you won't move your firewood.
I don't know about you, but when I'm making a fire, I tend to move it to a fire pit rather than lighting a tree right in place. I think this new anti-beetle message conflicts with Smokey the Bear telling me that only I can prevent forest fires.
The best part about Their Website is that they have a counter so the world knows how many people in each state have "signed" the pledge. The counter has 9 digits, which seems quite optimistic considering the highest state population is California with just under 37 Million People...and it's not even in the area that needs to be concerned about the Emerald Ash Borer Beetle. At least according to their own map. Also, even though I didn't select a state, the current counter was somewhere around 9000.
But the commercial specifically told you not to move your firewood.
Yes, but since I don't get it, I'm not going to follow it.
Then the beetles win.
A new radio commercial has come into vogue lately about beetles. It's akin to the PSA's that still run in my old college town about saving the Black-Footed Ferret and the prairie dogs from extinction. The bottom line here is that you're not supposed to move your firewood. In fact, you're supposed to go to their website and electronically "sign" a pledge saying that you won't move your firewood.
I don't know about you, but when I'm making a fire, I tend to move it to a fire pit rather than lighting a tree right in place. I think this new anti-beetle message conflicts with Smokey the Bear telling me that only I can prevent forest fires.
The best part about Their Website is that they have a counter so the world knows how many people in each state have "signed" the pledge. The counter has 9 digits, which seems quite optimistic considering the highest state population is California with just under 37 Million People...and it's not even in the area that needs to be concerned about the Emerald Ash Borer Beetle. At least according to their own map. Also, even though I didn't select a state, the current counter was somewhere around 9000.
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Give it the heave ho?
How much Faith could a Faith Heaver heave if a Faith Heaver could heave Faith?
I worry about you.
Not long ago, as I was driving home from work, I saw a license plate that said "HVEFAITH". Obviously, the driver is encouraging everyone to Have Faith in some sort of greater power. Also obviously, my swirling miasma of a mind took this as a challenge to see what else I could turn it into.
I have faith in your ability to distort reality.
The first thought that came to mind was instead of "Have Faith" was to "Heave Faith" as some sort of tangible artifact waiting to be chucked into a pond or something. This of course makes me ask myself, "How can you heave faith?" Following that, it became a simple matter of determining if Faith were both tangible and heavable, how much energy one would use to do said heaving. After that, it's a really short jump to comparing Faith Heavers with Woodchucks, and my new tongue twister is born.
I worry about you.
Not long ago, as I was driving home from work, I saw a license plate that said "HVEFAITH". Obviously, the driver is encouraging everyone to Have Faith in some sort of greater power. Also obviously, my swirling miasma of a mind took this as a challenge to see what else I could turn it into.
I have faith in your ability to distort reality.
The first thought that came to mind was instead of "Have Faith" was to "Heave Faith" as some sort of tangible artifact waiting to be chucked into a pond or something. This of course makes me ask myself, "How can you heave faith?" Following that, it became a simple matter of determining if Faith were both tangible and heavable, how much energy one would use to do said heaving. After that, it's a really short jump to comparing Faith Heavers with Woodchucks, and my new tongue twister is born.
Monday, July 20, 2009
FRAUD!!!
Last Month's Sametime Status Theme Week was staged and was actually produced in a Hollywood basement.
Today is the 40th anniversary of the Apollo 11 lunar landing. The greatest scientific achievement of its generation saw Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin become the first humans to set foot on the moon. Really exciting stuff.
If you believe it happened, of course. Realistically, today is the 40th anniversary of the government faking the lunar landing...for obvious reasons. I mean...think about it.
Yeah, the government has nothing to gain from faking the moon landing. It's a myth sustained by rampant conspiracy theorists with abundant time and internet access.
Then how do you explain the newest proof?
Your use of the word "proof" is troubling.
NASA claims to have "lost" the original moon landing footage and is having a Hollywood film restoration company Rebuild and Enhance old copies of the film.
This is proof of absolutely nothing.
It proves that they faked the original, and THEY didn't want anybody to find out. So since the original was a fake, they have no reason to preserve its integrity and don't mind recreating it in stunning high-def. Wake up, people!
Today is the 40th anniversary of the Apollo 11 lunar landing. The greatest scientific achievement of its generation saw Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin become the first humans to set foot on the moon. Really exciting stuff.
If you believe it happened, of course. Realistically, today is the 40th anniversary of the government faking the lunar landing...for obvious reasons. I mean...think about it.
Yeah, the government has nothing to gain from faking the moon landing. It's a myth sustained by rampant conspiracy theorists with abundant time and internet access.
Then how do you explain the newest proof?
Your use of the word "proof" is troubling.
NASA claims to have "lost" the original moon landing footage and is having a Hollywood film restoration company Rebuild and Enhance old copies of the film.
This is proof of absolutely nothing.
It proves that they faked the original, and THEY didn't want anybody to find out. So since the original was a fake, they have no reason to preserve its integrity and don't mind recreating it in stunning high-def. Wake up, people!
Friday, July 17, 2009
Up top!
Jeremy’s Sametime Status is a proud supporter of Rooftime 17, this weekend at the Oakwood Friends School in Poughkeepsie.
Today's Sametime Status has been replaced by the annual plug for the Rooftime charity volleyball tournament, held every year in Poughkeepsie NY to benefit the Dutchess County Coalition for the Homeless.
That's right. This annual grass doubles (And quads on Sunday) tournament is seeking to raise over $8000 for the Coalition to put their grand total up over $100,000 over the 17-year history of the event. So far, the weather looks great for both days...
Knocking on wood now...
so come on out and play, or just show your support for the other players. There are also food, clothing, and cookie vendors you can support as well. All proceeds go directly to the shelter, so it's definitely for a good cause.
For more information, visit the tournament website: www.rooftime.net.
Today's Sametime Status has been replaced by the annual plug for the Rooftime charity volleyball tournament, held every year in Poughkeepsie NY to benefit the Dutchess County Coalition for the Homeless.
That's right. This annual grass doubles (And quads on Sunday) tournament is seeking to raise over $8000 for the Coalition to put their grand total up over $100,000 over the 17-year history of the event. So far, the weather looks great for both days...
Knocking on wood now...
so come on out and play, or just show your support for the other players. There are also food, clothing, and cookie vendors you can support as well. All proceeds go directly to the shelter, so it's definitely for a good cause.
For more information, visit the tournament website: www.rooftime.net.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
No really...they're not
This is not the Sametime Status you are looking for
Sorry...my mistake. I thought it was. You can go about your business. Move along.
So today's Sametime Status is a whimsical homage to the Jedi mind trick from Star Wars.
Hopefully, you don't need much more explanation than that.
Nope. I think we're good, thanks.
In that case, see you tomorrow!
Sorry...my mistake. I thought it was. You can go about your business. Move along.
So today's Sametime Status is a whimsical homage to the Jedi mind trick from Star Wars.
Hopefully, you don't need much more explanation than that.
Nope. I think we're good, thanks.
In that case, see you tomorrow!
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
How close is Skynet?
The stamp machine at the post office can feel pleasure.
It begins?
Indeed. Machines have started experiencing feelings. While there is no evidence to suggest that the Famed Toaster of Hades actually feels anger and wrath, I personally witnessed a machine feeling pleasure.
I'll get the foil helmets.
I was in the post office not long ago buying stamps...since occasionally, I still have to mail stuff. It was early in the morning, the post office wasn't open, and I used the automated postage machine. It's actually not a bad thing. It weighs your package and calculates postage, or sells sheets of stamps and whatnot. It beats the crap out of standing in line at noon with everybody else in the county.
At the end of my transaction, the machine printed out a receipt, and then displayed on its screen that it had been a pleasure to serve me. I got a little scared and went quickly out to my car.
It begins?
Indeed. Machines have started experiencing feelings. While there is no evidence to suggest that the Famed Toaster of Hades actually feels anger and wrath, I personally witnessed a machine feeling pleasure.
I'll get the foil helmets.
I was in the post office not long ago buying stamps...since occasionally, I still have to mail stuff. It was early in the morning, the post office wasn't open, and I used the automated postage machine. It's actually not a bad thing. It weighs your package and calculates postage, or sells sheets of stamps and whatnot. It beats the crap out of standing in line at noon with everybody else in the county.
At the end of my transaction, the machine printed out a receipt, and then displayed on its screen that it had been a pleasure to serve me. I got a little scared and went quickly out to my car.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
He's just doin' the best he can
Somebody may now explain to me why my MP3 collection includes "Ramblin' Man" by The Allman Brothers
It's not a bad song. There's nothing wrong with having is as part of your library.
That's very true. I have nothing against the song.
So why did it become the latest in your series of Sametime Statuses about songs that shouldn't be part of your MP3 collection?
Because I have nothing FOR this song either. I don't particularly like it, I don't know most of the words, and I tend to skip over it on the MP3 player every time it comes on. So I'm left with the question of why I downloaded the song (perfectly legally, of course) in the first place.
And I'm guessing you're going to tell us. Otherwise, what's the point of having a Blag?
That's the spirit! The reason I have it is because I was looking for "Ramblin' Gamblin' Man" by Bob Seger, and downloaded this one instead.
Moron.
For whatever reason, not only have I never deleted it, even though I really don't want it...but I've now propagated the song to at least 3 computers, a stand-alone MP3 player, and a personal network drive. So not only have I not deleted it, I've made such a huge production out of having to delete it that I likely never will. I'll just keep skipping over it when it plays. Good times!
It's not a bad song. There's nothing wrong with having is as part of your library.
That's very true. I have nothing against the song.
So why did it become the latest in your series of Sametime Statuses about songs that shouldn't be part of your MP3 collection?
Because I have nothing FOR this song either. I don't particularly like it, I don't know most of the words, and I tend to skip over it on the MP3 player every time it comes on. So I'm left with the question of why I downloaded the song (perfectly legally, of course) in the first place.
And I'm guessing you're going to tell us. Otherwise, what's the point of having a Blag?
That's the spirit! The reason I have it is because I was looking for "Ramblin' Gamblin' Man" by Bob Seger, and downloaded this one instead.
Moron.
For whatever reason, not only have I never deleted it, even though I really don't want it...but I've now propagated the song to at least 3 computers, a stand-alone MP3 player, and a personal network drive. So not only have I not deleted it, I've made such a huge production out of having to delete it that I likely never will. I'll just keep skipping over it when it plays. Good times!
Monday, July 13, 2009
It happens on occasion
Friday the 13th falls on a monday again?
mondays suck.
I couldn't agree more. One of very few things that can make monday worse is for Friday the 13th to fall on one.
So what are you going to do about it? I plan on finishing up your Blag here and going back to bed.
Well, I'll probably stick it out and try to have an adventure free day of productivity at work.
How's that working out for you?
So far, not well.
mondays suck.
I couldn't agree more. One of very few things that can make monday worse is for Friday the 13th to fall on one.
So what are you going to do about it? I plan on finishing up your Blag here and going back to bed.
Well, I'll probably stick it out and try to have an adventure free day of productivity at work.
How's that working out for you?
So far, not well.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Shouldn't it be X-TREME?
Training for the 2010 Extreme Ironing Competition
Uhm....Extreme Ironing?
Sadly, I am not making this up. The Extreme Ironing Bureau defines it as "The latest danger sport that combines the thrills of an extreme outdoor activity with the satisfaction of a well pressed shirt."
The idea is to take a picture or video of yourself ironing a shirt in some bizarre place, such as the bottom of a lake, the top of a mountain, or while suspended between two rocks in South Africa.
You might ask yourself, "Why does such a thing exist?" and I can assure you I have no answer. All that I have for you is a Link To Their Website. Enjoy!
Uhm....Extreme Ironing?
Sadly, I am not making this up. The Extreme Ironing Bureau defines it as "The latest danger sport that combines the thrills of an extreme outdoor activity with the satisfaction of a well pressed shirt."
The idea is to take a picture or video of yourself ironing a shirt in some bizarre place, such as the bottom of a lake, the top of a mountain, or while suspended between two rocks in South Africa.
You might ask yourself, "Why does such a thing exist?" and I can assure you I have no answer. All that I have for you is a Link To Their Website. Enjoy!
Thursday, July 9, 2009
The whole thing stinks
Seriously. Who lets a dog run free on a volleyball court?
Probably dog owners. What's your point?
First of all, I'm not talking about owners who bring their dog with them to play ball, and leave them off to the side on a leash with a bowl of water and tend to them on occasion. Those are fine.
I more have an issue with people who bring their dogs to public places and don't clean up after them. Those people suck.
And they really should come over tonight and clean off my shoes.
Probably dog owners. What's your point?
First of all, I'm not talking about owners who bring their dog with them to play ball, and leave them off to the side on a leash with a bowl of water and tend to them on occasion. Those are fine.
I more have an issue with people who bring their dogs to public places and don't clean up after them. Those people suck.
And they really should come over tonight and clean off my shoes.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
I like them too
In a bit of Revisionist History, Sam I Am merely used Green Food Coloring to pull a mildly elaborate prank
What ever happened to the Son of Sam I Am?
So today's Sametime Status is pretty self-explanatory, and I'm running late because it's a busy day. So that's all I've got for you. See you tomorrow!
What ever happened to the Son of Sam I Am?
So today's Sametime Status is pretty self-explanatory, and I'm running late because it's a busy day. So that's all I've got for you. See you tomorrow!
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
More Fun and Frivolity
Caution: Screwy Curve Ahead
That's good to know. You should always plan in advance or screwy curves.
For those of you who may not know, my brain does not function well in the morning.
Only in the morning?
So not long ago, I'm driving in to work, and I see one of those bright orange construction signs on the side of the road. Wanting to be a safe and alert driver, I read what's on the sign...and my brain registers, "Caution: Screwy Curve Ahead."
Being immediately confused, and knowing that such a sign doesn't exist, I did a mini mental-reboot and read the sign again. This time, it said, "Caution: Survey Crew Ahead."
That's good to know. You should always plan in advance or screwy curves.
For those of you who may not know, my brain does not function well in the morning.
Only in the morning?
So not long ago, I'm driving in to work, and I see one of those bright orange construction signs on the side of the road. Wanting to be a safe and alert driver, I read what's on the sign...and my brain registers, "Caution: Screwy Curve Ahead."
Being immediately confused, and knowing that such a sign doesn't exist, I did a mini mental-reboot and read the sign again. This time, it said, "Caution: Survey Crew Ahead."
Thursday, July 2, 2009
It's never seemed that hard to me...
Apparently, the Romans were really bad at making candles
I think this is politically incorrect...but I'm not sure
So I was in a store not long ago looking for scented candles (as I am wont to do), and I came across what I thought was a new style. It was called "Roman Candle" and it looked bright and festive, so I thought I'd give it a try. It had some sort of warning on it, but I ignored it like the warnings on all the scented candles I buy. It's usually something about not leaving it unattended or not lighting indoors or using a blow-torch to light it...you know...the usual stuff.
Kids aren't allowed to sit "Indian Style" anymore...it's called "Pretzel Style." I'm actually not making that up. So why are we allowed to buy "Roman" Candles?
So I light the candle in my room, and much to my surprise, it starts shooting stuff all over the place and filling the room with smoke. It was really quite distracting.
Not long ago, all the NCAA teams with Native American-themed mascots had to change them.
So I was a little shocked at this turn of events. The Romans were remarkably famous for their architecture and aqueducts and ability to build long-lasting roads. I'm just surprised that they couldn't figure out how to make a nice slow, clean-burning scented candle for me. It apparently took all the way to the 1700's (The "Yankee" days) before somebody could make a good candle. So I think from now on, I'm going to be buying the new Yankee-American style scented candles instead of the old-fashioned Roman version.
Jeremy and I, along with Miracle Posting Inc. would like to wish everyone a safe and explosive Fourth of July full of swimming pools and all the hamburgers you could want. "Jeremy Is In The Office" will be Out of the Office starting tomorrow and returning Tuesday, July 7th with more Fun and Frivolity.
I think this is politically incorrect...but I'm not sure
So I was in a store not long ago looking for scented candles (as I am wont to do), and I came across what I thought was a new style. It was called "Roman Candle" and it looked bright and festive, so I thought I'd give it a try. It had some sort of warning on it, but I ignored it like the warnings on all the scented candles I buy. It's usually something about not leaving it unattended or not lighting indoors or using a blow-torch to light it...you know...the usual stuff.
Kids aren't allowed to sit "Indian Style" anymore...it's called "Pretzel Style." I'm actually not making that up. So why are we allowed to buy "Roman" Candles?
So I light the candle in my room, and much to my surprise, it starts shooting stuff all over the place and filling the room with smoke. It was really quite distracting.
Not long ago, all the NCAA teams with Native American-themed mascots had to change them.
So I was a little shocked at this turn of events. The Romans were remarkably famous for their architecture and aqueducts and ability to build long-lasting roads. I'm just surprised that they couldn't figure out how to make a nice slow, clean-burning scented candle for me. It apparently took all the way to the 1700's (The "Yankee" days) before somebody could make a good candle. So I think from now on, I'm going to be buying the new Yankee-American style scented candles instead of the old-fashioned Roman version.
Jeremy and I, along with Miracle Posting Inc. would like to wish everyone a safe and explosive Fourth of July full of swimming pools and all the hamburgers you could want. "Jeremy Is In The Office" will be Out of the Office starting tomorrow and returning Tuesday, July 7th with more Fun and Frivolity.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Your Home and Native Land...Whether you know it or not
Happy Canada Day, everybody!
Everybody knows that this Blag is based in New York.
That doesn't matter...the power of the Internets is worldwide. This blag has fans in foreign countries, as well as some Americans who are actually Canadian citizens.
How does that work?
Well, not long ago, (April 17th to be specific) Canada changed their citizenship rules which effectively granted Canadian Citizenship to many people who formerly didn't have it. So, believe it or not, you may be Canadian. You can real all about it on the Canadian Citizenship and Immigration Website. So, start saying "Eh" at the end of sentences, and tune in to watch your favourite Hockey team make a big splash on the first day of NHL free agency.
When is the first day of NHL Free Agency anyway?
Strangely enough....it's today!
Everybody knows that this Blag is based in New York.
That doesn't matter...the power of the Internets is worldwide. This blag has fans in foreign countries, as well as some Americans who are actually Canadian citizens.
How does that work?
Well, not long ago, (April 17th to be specific) Canada changed their citizenship rules which effectively granted Canadian Citizenship to many people who formerly didn't have it. So, believe it or not, you may be Canadian. You can real all about it on the Canadian Citizenship and Immigration Website. So, start saying "Eh" at the end of sentences, and tune in to watch your favourite Hockey team make a big splash on the first day of NHL free agency.
When is the first day of NHL Free Agency anyway?
Strangely enough....it's today!
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