It's on

Fortunately for this round of "Jeremy vs. The Oil Company," it's warm outside


So there was this guy Occam...


Distant relative of Brutus Beefcake, and founder of the family business, but I don't expect anyone to get that joke.


...who put forth the theory that generally means that given a specific set of circumstances, the explanation that requires the fewest variables is the best explanation. It's a commonly accepted principle, and is most often correct, but when dealing with large, faceless automatonic corporations like...say...the oil company, tough to enforce.

The long and short of it is that not long ago, I received a hefty bill from the oil company for an oil delivery that arrived mere weeks ago. It's summer. I don't really need heating oil at the moment, but if they want to top off my tank so I'm ready for next winter...whatever. Of course, when they delivered said oil, they didn't leave one of the little delivery slips that says they delivered oil, so all of this happened unbeknownst to me. The other issue is that the amount of oil that was delivered would constitute a 43% increase in my usual oil consumption for the 3 months in between this delivery and the previous delivery (Actual calculation...not my usual made-up statistical nonsense, as evidenced by the fact that it's not 83%) . The other issue is that when I look at the tank, which has a level gauge on it, it says that the tank is half full, which would mean that in the few weeks since this latest delivery, I've gone through over 150 gallons of heating oil when it's been above 70 degrees, and the thermostats have been turned off. Either that, or the level gauge in my tank is broken...the level gauge that the very same oil company replaced almost exactly a year ago and has worked perfectly ever since. This is the explanation that I've received from the oil company. That I did in fact receive a delivery, they neglected to leave a delivery slip, my oil consumption for the late winter months (which were statistically warmer than average) was up by 43%, and my level gauge is broken...so their solution is to send a tech out to my house tonight to fix the gauge.

My boy William of Ockham might suggest an explanation with fewer variables. An explanation such as a delivery guy fat-fingering the wrong account number when delivering oil to somebody else's house. This would leave my tank at half full, no delivery slip on my door, my house with normal oil consumption, and a recently-repaired level gauge working correctly. Of course, my attempts to suggest this to the large faceless automatonic oil company have been worthless, so I get to leave work early today to wait for the friggin tech to show up to tell me my oil tank's level gauge is working.