Almost...

That was close. I was almost an idiot this morning


I don't even know where to begin. Almost? This Morning?


Strictly speaking, there was a moment this morning when I thought I had done something remarkably stupid.


As opposed to every other moment where you only do things with a standard amount of stupidity?


Like many places of business, the building I work in requires you to wear an ID badge at all time, and it also serves as a key to get you in the door. You're not allowed to be in the building without a badge, so if you forget it, you have to go 2 buildings over to the security office and get a temp badge-esque sticker to wear. It's akin to having a scarlet letter stuck to your shirt that marks you as a dummy who forgot their badge. Also, it doesn't open any doors, so you have to stand there like a dope waiting for somebody to let you in to any door with a badge lock. It's really quite embarrassing, and tends to serve as its own deterrent to forgetting your badge.

Because of all this, I have a safe and secure location in which I store my badge when I'm not at work, so that I'll have it with me at pretty much all times. Occasionally, I'll forget to put it away, and leave it on its lanyard around my neck when I go home. Its at these times that I make special arrangements so that there is no possibility that I'll leave it at home. I'll do something like tie the lanyard to my keys or wrap it around my wallet, so that I'll be guaranteed to at least have it in my hands when I'm getting ready to leave in the morning.

Such was the case last night...left the badge on when I got in the house, so I did the usual wrap it around my wallet thing. It worked like a charm, as in the morning, I picked it up and thought, "Oh yeah...my badge is here. Better not forget it." It's at this point in my story that my hands get cluttered. I was holding two water bottles, a gym bag, a laptop bag, my cell phone, my keys, my wallet, and my ID badge...and needed to get all of it to the car. The next time I had a thought (since it's been well established that my brain doesn't function properly early in the morning), I was in the car halfway to the gym and I thought, "now what did I do with my badge?" I quickly scanned all of my pockets and the normal secured location to no avail. I had pretty much decided that I put the badge down in order to put the phone, wallet, and keys into pockets and promptly left it at home. This would make me an idiot.

As it turns out, I actually put it in the trunk with the laptop bag, so all was well, and I got to preserve my dignity.


Which you promptly ruined when you made this your Sametime Status. Way to go, dummy.