It Was Early, Okay?

It’s remarkably difficult to find your ID badge when you’re holding your ID badge  

Those things are always in the last place you look.  

Very true...and when you've fooled yourself into not looking there, it turns into a problem.  

So, like many companies nowadays, to get into the building where I work, you need to scan a digital ID badge to unlock the door.  It's not a big deal, and it keeps things secure, so I'm okay with it.  I tend to keep my ID badge locked safely in the car so that it's always there for me when I get to work.  I take it out along with my laptop bag and I'm ready to start my workday.  See, if you forget your badge at home, you have to go to the security office, hope somebody is working there that day, show them your regular ID, get a temporary sticker badge that says you're allowed to go to work today, then stand by the door waiting for somebody to open it for you.  It's embarrassing, and people tend to make fun of your "badge of shame" throughout the day to add to the embarrassment.  It's the way things are.  

Not long ago, I had to run some errands after work, and in all of this fuss, I neglected to take my badge off and tuck it safely into the car.  So here I am, walking around a local store which carries supplies for your bedroom, bathroom, and perhaps other rooms of your house wearing my ID badge, my smiling face and company ID number looking back at everyone walking by.  I immediately became self-conscious about it and pulled off the lanyard to tuck it into the pocket of my jacket and saying to myself, "okay, self...remember to take it out of your pocket when you get back to the car."  I made two other stops on my journey that day, and after each one, to nobody's surprise whatsoever, I reminded myself that my badge was still in my pocket and not in the car.  I had to give myself at least three reminders to put my badge in the car.  

At some point, I did...and it was not memorable.  

Fast forward to today (which probably tells you all you need to know about when these errand adventures happened, but that's beside the point entirely), and here I am in the parking lot at work, getting ready to go into the office.  I grab my badge out of the car, retrieve my breakfast apple from the car's cup holder, pick the laptop bag off of the passenger's seat, and decide that I need to check my phone...I guess it beeped or something.  Badge and apple in one hand, I pull out my phone and scroll through phone stuff to my satisfaction, so now it's time to go inside.  

Badge and apple in one hand, I remember that the previous night, I had told myself to take my badge out of my jacket and put it in the car, ergo my badge must be in some unusual place.  Badge and apple in one hand, I search my jacket pocket for my badge to no avail.  Badge and apple in one hand, I search my car's storage location for my badge to no avail.  Badge and apple in one hand, I begin to wonder where I ended up putting my badge the previous night, pondering if I left it at home on the ledge where I tend to keep my keys and other gubbins.  Badge and apple in one hand, I begin to think about going over to the security office to collect my badge of shame so I can get into work.  Badge and apple in one hand, I set my laptop bag back down into the passenger seat.  Badge and apple in one hand, I start to put the apple back into the car's cup holder and notice that I have had my badge in my hand throughout this entire episode.  I decide I'm an idiot, collect the rest of my belongings and make my way inside.